There are as many opinions, thoughts and perspectives regarding male and female roles as there are stars in the sky.
For example, women are thought of as soft and men as hard.
What is the source for this?
From a Kabbalistic perspective, men need to be empowered to in order to stay on track to achieve their goals. They are not aware of this, but faith, as an example, doesn’t come easily for the male; in fact, it is quite a struggle.
Women, however, again sourced in Kabbalah, have been gifted with a strength to empower. This is seen most readily in her relationship with her husband and children. She is considered to be “the mainstay of the home,” because she is grounded in an ability to be present to details and to the task at hand. She is an innate multitasker and draws her power from a place of faith in a Higher Intelligence.
The most natural state for a man and a woman is the state of love.
The illustrious Rabbi Levi Yitzchak of Berditchev (b. 1740-d. 1810), famous for his unconditional love of his fellow, once told one of his students that he learned about love from a conversation between two drunks lying in the gutter:
One drunk said to the other, “You don’t love me.”
“Of course I love you,” said his friend.
“No you don’t. Because if you really loved me, you would know what hurts me.”
Most people think that loving someone is equivalent to doing something for them, speaking loving words to them, giving them a gift, etc. These are expressions of love, but pure love can be learned from our relationship with God.
The Kabbalists tell us that God created the universe in order to experience love. The great sage Rabbi Akiva (b. 50-d. 135) said that “loving your fellow as yourself is a
great and fundamental principle in the Torah,” and Rabbi Hillel, who lived even earlier, is famous for telling a non-believer who asked to be taught the entire Torah
while standing on one foot, “That which is hateful to you, do not do to your fellow. The rest is commentary; go and learn.”
All these are ways of teaching us to be sensitive to what hurts our fellow human beings. Once we are able to feel their suffering, we are on the way to truly loving them.
So what is our relationship with each other? It is one in which each person works to improve in the areas of communication, partnership, trust and love. By developing our sensitivity toward others around us, we are able to tap into a “soul level” of relationship, which is always, ALWAYS loving.
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